Attributed to both Jim Goodwin and Sydney J. Harris
Relaxing; an activity
or recreation
that provides
such relief; diversion; entertainment.
Last week I facilitated our Wednesday support group. The group
was small and all seemed very stressed/sad. During the meeting the box of
tissues went around the room at least twice. Everyone felt defeated and
hopeless. That was how we started but not how we finished the session. This
powerful little group helped one another and by the end of the meeting everyone
had some great techniques to help themselves and their loved one. I would like
to share a few of these techniques with you and hope they offer a bit of
relief.
First and foremost take care of yourself and have a plan in
place. These two go together because when there is a plan in place for your
loved one, should you die first, you can stop worrying about it. If you need
help with that plan call Memory Matters. This issue was the number one stress
factor for caregivers. I helped a woman get this plan in place and she said she
felt the weight of the world lifted from her shoulders. Get a plan!
Also, remember there are many options for “respite care.” Use
them and take a break. Do not feel
guilty. You must stay healthy.
Now what can you do at home to help both of you have a more
peaceful home? Some of the suggestions from my caregivers were:
·
Modify the environment to reduce potential
stressors that can create agitation and disorientation for a person with Alzheimer’s.
Noise, shadowy lighting, garish or highly contrasting colors, these seemingly
small things can keep someone
agitated. Soft colors, soft light, even soft music can make a big difference. Make some changes.
·
If you remain calm you may find your loved
one is much calmer. Try it!
·
Essential oils can help create a calm
environment. One of my caregivers said this approach has made a significant
improvement in her loved one’s behavior. She said he smiles when she lights the
oil diffuser. Buy some!
·
To help prevent wandering one caregiver
said by simply reassuring her husband he calms down. She said she rubs lavender
essential oil, just a small amount, on the palm of his hands and massages his
hands. He loves the aroma and the silky feeling of the oil. Then they both take
a deep breath, listen to his favorite songs, and he calms down.
·
Try and keep your cool. Look, we are only
human but do the best you can stay calm because when you lose your cool your
loved one can sense it and before you know it all hell breaks loose.
There are so many
techniques; so many little changes that can help you and your loved one live a
happier, calmer life. If you need suggestions visit one of our support groups
or make an appointment with one of our dementia care specialist. Call Memory
Matters at (843) 842-6688 or visit our website at www.memory-matters.org.
Karen Doughtie
